Wednesday August 12, 2009

Giving Yourself the Edge in the Fertility Challenge

What I've found after working with hundreds of clients over the years, is that no matter how much you may desire to have a child, or how much of money you may have invested into the process, there are hidden emotional and spiritual blocks which could be totally stopping you from holding your precious baby in your arms. Clearly, there is a strong subconscious emotional element to giving you the edge when faced with fertility issues.

When I work with clients using my “Life Shift” techniques, so often I find what is blocking the client from having a successful outcome are their subconscious and conscious fears that are lodged in the uterus, or the third brain. I like to refer to the uterus as a third brain because it has a whole different agenda and emotional life separate from that of the mind.

If you have faced the devastation and disappointment of unsuccessful IVF transfers, perhaps an important piece of what may be blocking your ability to get pregnant and achieve a successful pregnancy is what may be happening in the Subconscious.
 
I want to share with you something I call the Secret Subconscious Saboteurs. Our subconscious mind rules 80 percent of what we believe we can achieve. I like to say, 'when we believe it, we will see it' and that thought has played such a large part in my success and the successes in my practice with my clients. Sometimes these Saboteurs are the hidden belief systems from our childhood which may be unconsciously driving us in our present life. For example, you may have seen your mother be subservient and treated less than equal, so as much as you believe in equality today, you may find yourself playing a subservient role at home or in the workplace. Or, you may have achieved an incredible career, but there's a powerlessness lurking that stops you in one area of your life.  

Another of the Secret Saboteurs can be Subconscious Resistance. There can be deep negative feelings and fears which may be buried in your subconscious and make no rational sense at all. I've discovered this subconscious resistance within myself during my own IVF journey and with many of my clients' journeys with IVF as well.

Some of these other Secret Saboteurs may be:

Financial fears:  Not being able to support or afford all the expenses of having children.
 
Childhood fears: If someone has had an angry or abusive parent, there may be an underlying fear is that they might end up being an abusive parent to their own child.
 
Partner/Abandonment fears: There may also be fears that the partner might not be a good father, or possibly even leave and abandon the family, especially if the client has experienced abandonment in their own childhood.

One client of mine, Nancy, had a mother who developed a very bad case of asthma after she gave birth to Nancy. As a result, Nancy's mother was medically challenged for the rest of her life and not emotionally available to Nancy as a parent. In fact, Nancy even became a caretaker to her mother from a very early age. In her sessions with me, Nancy uncovered her unknown terror that if she became a mother, she would get sick and cast that burden of care taking on her own child. So although Nancy had done many rounds of in-vitro, it was not successful until she released that fear. Once she did release the belief that becoming a mother would mean she would take on her mother's illness, I then helped her to release the emotional traumas from her childhood, we were able to reinforce a positive visualization and affirm that she would have a healthy baby and healthy outcome for herself.
 
I would like to share her affirmation with you: I asked Nancy to visualize herself as a healthy mom holding a healthy baby while saying this affirmation: “After giving birth, my health and vitality gets stronger every day. I am alive, vibrant, and grateful and excited about my family's future.”

As you uncover these Secret Subconscious Saboteurs within a safe, nurturing and supportive environment; you can suddenly turn a painful and frustrating scenario into one of the most beautiful, fulfilling experiences a woman can ever have--becoming a mother to a beautiful child.